Church in desperate need of a pest control

termite treatmentTwo weeks ago my grandfather got home from church in a fluster and told me that he needed to call someone about pest inspections. Dandenong united church has been my grandfather’s second home for over thirty years, he loved that place like no other.

When he mentioned the termites I was a little shocked. I asked him what he needed a pest controller for and he told me that the church was falling to bits. Everyone in the church was starting to notice how bad the place was beginning to look. Admittedly they had been putting off a pest inspection for the past year because all the donation money was going to feed the homeless..

My grandfather noticed the floorboards in the Sunday School room were so bad that it was a hazard for the children to go in there. He asked me if I knew of any good termite treatment companies in Dandenong the area. I told him about a good termite company that my wife had contracted when they found white ants in her art studio. The company was quick, affordable and professional. I still had their business card at home so that night I sent my grandfather the details.

Later that week my grandfather called the place and arranged for a quote to get the church inspected for termites. Because my grandfather wasn’t a great driver he asked me to drive him to meet the pest controller. When we arrived at the church the pest control van was waiting in the car park. We walked the men through the church and my grandfather pointed out where most of the visible damage was. The guys were surprised that the church hadn’t done something about the problem sooner. A termite removal really needed to be done before anyone entered the church again. Especially if people would be singing and dancing with children running around.

My grandfather booked in the termite treatment for the next available time and with that we went home. I could tell my grandfather was relieved, but concerned at the same time about the cost of everything. I told him not to worry as the people at church would be more than happy to help out, and if they still didn’t have enough I would be able to cover the remainder of the cost. I don’t think I’ve ever seen my grandfather more proud of me.

I Guess it’s the Quiet Life…

Sorrento pest controlYears later and I’m still adjusting to being a ‘normal person’. That’s the thing about being celebrity: it brings you up so high, high above the clouds…and when you come crashing down, you break into a thousand little pieces.

I’m talking in my old song lyrics again, which my therapist says is a subconscious coping mechanism. Only a few years ago, everyone in Australia knew my name and face! I was Shara, the singer with only a first name (all the best ones do) who smashed all the records and sold out concerts everywhere. How quickly people forget.

I’m hardly even recognised any more. I just moved into a two-storey home in Sorrento, finally accepting that maybe the quiet life was for me. I keep batting my eyelashes at the people in the supermarket, and it’s not having any effect. Just yesterday I had to call in Sorrento pest control, and I thought them being in the same house as me would surely do it. All that time, and they’d eventually recognise the famous Shara! I was at the very top of the charts, ahead of the rest of the game! I couldn’t even walk down the street without someone asking for my autograph. I was partying in Ibiza, providing hit songs for blockbuster movies, being invited to premieres. Surely these pest control people would catch on! But it seems I’ve fallen farther into obscurity than I realised. They dealt with my ant problem in record time and moved on with nothing more than a slight, lingering glance.

That’s my life now. All those adoring fans, replaced with a small glance of confusion. I still have my fan club, which keeps me going…but there are so few of them left. Suppose I better get used to the quiet life, and at least I’m still fabulously wealthy from all the concert tickets and CDs sold. I don’t have to worry about termite inspections from Mornington and beyond, either. Although before I never lived in places that needed termite control so…mine is a sad story indeed.