Functions IRL are stressful

party venue MelbourneYeah, definitely too much of the same thing. My brain is melting.

Every year we have this stupid celebration, and I don’t even know why because it’s pointless. The Australian Hermit Gaming Conglomeration is, by definition, meant to be people who do not want to meet each other. That was just fine in the beginning, and in fact up until recently. Now we’ve got a new president, and he’s making us leave our basements on a yearly basis or we lose our membership. And this group is all we’ve got, so you’ve got to have a really good reason for not attending one of the meetings.

Yeah, so anyway…at least I’m not on the planning committee. I’ve heard they had a lot of trouble finding an actual party venue in Melbourne because none of them ever leave their houses and they don’t know what they look like. Like, they don’t know what actual function rooms look like, because they generally spend more time blowing up aliens and creating virtual worlds in Mine-Craft, the game where you make your very own spaceship, one about which you can say ‘this is mine, this craft’ and then you travel the universe terraforming planets to your personal specifications. The scope for creativity is just so vast, you wouldn’t believe. And we could be in there, all that time we’re crammed into a tiny room and being forced to interact IRL. IRL is so overrated, and we chat to each other with our headsets anyway, so why? Just…why?

We’ve only had one in Melbourne so far, and it was almost unbearable. I was so nervous at meeting everyone I nearly sweat through my fedora. Then I spent the whole time talking to DemonRed96, who was also at the party but we didn’t see each other face-to-face because we both brought our headsets. Still no idea what he looks like. Probably never will, especially if we follow through with next year’s plans and sign up for ice skating lessons. I might have to find a new society.

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